Church Woes...Yo

Lately, Kiana has had a 'thing' about church.
She starts in the morning being grouchy about not having anything to wear. Nothing matches. She wore that clothing item last week. She doesn't like another clothing item. Another item looks stupid.
As the time nears for us to leave she's grouchy we have to go. And she lets us know it as she huffs out the door. Whoever invented Kiana-proof door hinges is a saint.

Today was a 2-hour conference versus 3 hours of normal church. I thought she'd be tickled. Oh, she was. Tickled with grouchiness. And she let that shine through like a colorful sunset on paradise. The meeting hadn't even started when she and Ethan were play-hitting, her grouchy face, "Mom! Moooom! Ethan won't leave me alone." He thinks it's funny and is chuckling. She's grouchy because he's chuckling; the never-ending cycle of insanity. I'm wondering where the circus clowns and peanuts are. I point for Ethan to trade me spots, separating the two. I love how I don't even have to say anything; normal drill.

They did say it smelled like cotton candy when we arrived. It did.

Twenty minutes into the meeting, she's rocking back and forth, "Mom! When is this OVER?!" I remind her the people behind us can see her face. "I DON'T CARE!" She could be a poster child for the Mad Face...we could make money! I told her it's 2 hours. And stop complaining.

Then Maiya is talking too loud for Kiana's taste. It's a whisper, but Kiana's bugged. "MAIYA! STOP TALKING!" I whisper it's OK. She whispers, "NO IT'S NOT!" with eyes the devil himself would run from. She starts touching Maiya, Maiya gets upset, "Mooom! Kiana's being mean." Out comes the pointer finger and Maiya moves down. Kiana doesn't lose any ground,"Psh! Like THAT'S gonna fix anything." If I was paid a buck for every time I did the roll-my-dead-eyes look I'd be rich. Then she leaned her knees into me, rocking back and forth asking to go home. In addition to grouchy faces, she also speaks good Whinese. After a few seconds I calmly looked at her,"I heard you perfectly clear. You want to go home. The answer is the same. No." "Ugh, I can't wait to move out!" My first thought on the inside is 'neither can I'.

I tell her she's crowding my space and please back off. She realizes what she is doing and doesn't move. So I ignore her awhile. Finally she moves. It doesn't mean she wasn't filled with big sighs, arms folding and unfolding, hands rubbing, body rocking or annoying grrrrrrr's the rest of the meeting. At the universal 'amen' after the closing prayer she at least folded her chair like I asked. And when Maiya wanted to pick up hymnals, she threw her hands in the air and announced,"I'm outta her!"

And she was!

Later, our neighbor said he watched Kiana huffing it home - he imitated her wide stomping - up the driveway, grouchy face, punch in the garage code, throw her hands in the air (like ,whatever!) and slam the door on the way into the house. A girl on a mission. Yep. That's her. He was laughing so hard. So were we.

After lunch, each child had something to write in their Reflections Journals about their mis-behavior. In addition to writing some sentences, Kiana was to write a short paragraph on her attitude towards the sacrifices our family's ancestors have made in the gospel. I'm not sure it worked out as I had planned...

She also included a 2-page 'Reasonable Note' of her own free will. I was impressed. So I wrote her back a 'Reasonable Response'.

The one thing that keeps me going is knowing that, in the end, this IS worth it. Every Sunday. Every family prayer. Every single grouchy scowl.

She still looks cute when she does that.